Wedding Couples Left In The Lurch

Call me crazy, old-fashioned, out-of-touch with the real world, Polyannish, but I approach my DJ service with the idea that my clients are important and deserve my attention. I know…it’s probably not what you might think when you think of a DJ. But the service I perform is usually for a once-in-a-lifetime event for a person or a couple who are trusting me with a very important day. They will usually sign up with me months in advance and trust me, at least, to honor their deposit and contract. But to me, it’s more. It’s about building strong relationships with clients and going beyond their expectations. But for some wedding vendors, it’s nothing more than business and service has little or nothing to do with it. I’m sure it happens all the time, though I can’t prove it. A couple lays down a hefty down payment for wedding vendor services and, at the last minute, the couple is left in the lurch with little time to secure another service and a big fight on their hands to get their deposit back. Here are just a few of the stories I’ve found that prove my point.

A VENUE CLOSES WITHOUT WARNING – This first story is about a local venue in the Philadelphia suburbs called “Gypsy Rose Inn.” I am very familiar with this venue and though it seemed a little old to me, it was a nice venue nonetheless. Most impressive was the outside garden area under a thick canopy of trees. The garden area, perfect for ceremonies, was bordered by a cool creek which looked so refreshing on a hot August Saturday afternoon. Some time last year, however, I went by the venue and saw it was all boarded up with a “Closed For Renovations” sign. It was an unexpected sight. Turns out, it was not closed just for renovations…it was closed for good due to liquor violations and financial mismangagement and the property is now in disrepair and up for sale.

In the aftermath, according to the article, there were a dozen or so couples who had just weeks or a few months to find another venue, and a big fight to get back their deposit. You can read the whole story here.

ANOTHER VENUE CLOSES – Another story of a venue which closed is posted here. In this case, however, it doesn’t seem to have closed as abruptly as the Gypsie Rose Inn. Further, it seems all but a couple of the brides were notified. But those brides who were not notified were left scrambling for another venue with only weeks before their wedding. Now, new invitations had to be printed; new contracts for the other vendors had to be re-inked; and a whole lot of stress had to be managed in those final weeks leading up to the wedding.

NO-SHOW DJ – At the risk of indicting my own profession, here is a bride’s story of a DJ with 21 years of experience who never showed up at the wedding. This one is very gripping and you will want to watch the whole vid. I was saddened when I saw this. See the vid in 2 parts: Part 1 and Part 2.

Although I find a lot wrong with that video and with that whole case, it can’t be disputed that this DJ should have at least notified the bride that he would not be able to make it to the wedding. That would be the first thing I would do. The second thing I would do would be to find another DJ. In fact, that bit is in my contract; that is, if I can’t fulfill my duties, I will look for a replacement DJ.

But long before the wedding day, my brides hear from me on a regular basis. I send out a monthly newsletter, if for no other reason than to let my brides know I have not skipped town with their deposit. I know this is her big day, her once-in-a-lifetime event; an event which she, in a lot of cases, has been dreaming of since she was a little girl. Therefore, for me, it is not just another Saturday night gig. I have to believe she wants to hear from me; I have to believe she wants to know I’m still there. …That I’m thinking about her and watching the calendar for her day to come. …That I’m doing the requisite prep commensurate with such a special day. …That I consider her big day to be my big day too, and that no small thing is going to delay or divert me.

Like I said, call me crazy.

Will Stephens is the owner/operator of 4Most Sound & Light based in the Philadelphia, PA area. He serves Delaware Valley brides with superb service and a memorable experience. If you are in the Delaware Valley, Lehigh Valley, or Reading, PA area and you are looking for a Philadelphia wedding DJ, you are welcome to visit his site at www.4MostSound.com.

Copyright Will Stephens, 2009

Further Thoughts On What Goes On Behind The DJ Console

I hope I never stop improving in this biz. Last night I had a wedding that prompted me to lay awake and think for a bit afterwards. I was thinking about the music and what I do to make it better and what else I can do. While I have said before in this blog, there is so much more to being a DJ than just stringing songs together, last night was one more example. I played a song that had some junk in the beginning which I had not edited. First thing this morning, I edited it out, once and for all! Goes to show the behind-the-scenes work of a DJ is a continuous process.

The song that prompted these thoughts is “It Takes Two” by Rob Base. The song was requested just before a Madonna song was about to end, and because they looked like they would mix well together I cued it up with mere seconds to spare. I didn’t get a chance to hear it in the headphones before putting it on, and when it dropped, the dance floor halted for about 13 seconds. “It Takes Two” opens with about 13 seconds of “junk” – some extraneous synthesized speech introducing the song. It had been a long time since I played this song, and I forgot about the intro.

13 seconds might not sound like much, but it’s all relevant. Close your eyes for 13 seconds while driving and see what happens! Allow people to park on the dance floor for 13 seconds, and the floor will empty out. That’s what happened, until the guy who requested the song brought all his friends back out to the dance floor and filled it up again. 13 seconds is actually a very long time on the dance floor. Just 3 seconds is enough for people to decide to sit this one out.

Learning and preparing the music is an ongoing process.  There are beats-per-minute to tap out, vulgarities to clean up, skits at the start and at the end of songs to edit out, awkward transitions to note, and just generally seeing what songs work together.

Here are some expamples of songs that need work before they are ready for the dance floor.  Take “Runaround Sue” by Dion & The Belmonts for example.  The first 22 seconds will bring the dance floor to a halt:  “Here’s my story, it’s sad but true….”  Besides, who wants to hear about a runaround girlfriend at a wedding?  I cue this song to about 22 seconds into the song.  It’s a great swing number and it never fails to bring the ladies to the dance floor.  Same thing with “Baby Got Back.”  It fills the dance floor every time, but it’s imperative that I cue the music after all the talk at the beginning.  You will find skits at the end of songs as well.  One recent example is Chris brown’s “Kiss, Kiss” which has a skit at both the front and the back.  For this song, I cue past the opening skit to about 30 seconds in, and then fade out at about 3:50 or so.  Knowing how a song starts and ends enables me to mix and segue between songs more effectively, which keeps the dance floor happy.

But it’s not just talking at the start of a song that I need to pay attention to.  Sometimes the intro music detracts from the energy of the dance floor.  Take Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ On A Prayer“.  The intro music is quiet and ethereal.  Then at about 21 seconds, the drums kick in with a startling “ba-da-ba-da-ba.”  This is usually where I cue the music.  I use that cue point to jolt the dance floor back to life after a slow set.  I could also talk over the intro with good effect.  But if I try to mix and segue from some other song into this one, the slow quiet intro makes it awkward, if not impossible, segue.

It’s not about just stringing songs together.  As a DJ, my job is to create an experience; to shape the night.  To lead the guests or patrons on a journey.  To seduce them with the beat and to totally suck them in and make them submit.  To build tension and then finally arrive at the blow-off.  To create a memory.  This takes lots of learning and lots of playing out before one learns how to do this.  It involves knowing the music and using the right tune at the right time in the right way and the only way you know that is with experience.

The point is, it’s not just enough to have the music; you have to know the music to use it effectively.  And there is lots to learn.  How long is the song?  Does it have a slow or quiet start or does it start w/ a long beat-infused intro?  Does it fade out or does it end cold?  How many beats-per-minute (BPM) does it have and are the BPM consistent to the end?  Some songs start at one tempo and end a bit slower or faster.  Where are the breaks and what can I mix into the song and where?  What is that kick drum/snare drum/high-hat doing?  When do the vocals kick in?  How long is the intro or the outro and is it too long and where can I mix in or mix out?  Will this 30-second intro kill the dance floor or is the beat strong enough and the music interesting enough to sustain the dance floor before the vocals start?  Who will like this song?…is it a girl song or a guy song?  What does the dance floor need at this precise second?  Is it this song?  And if I play this song, where will it lead?  What do I follow it with?  What effect on the dance floor has this song had in the past?

I know the idea of playing music for someone’s party looks easy.  But there is more to it than meets the eye when it’s done right.  If you want your guests to dance, to have a great time, and to talk about your event afterward, hire a seasoned DJ to shape the night and create an experience.  Never mind what it looks like.  All the hard work was done before your party even started!

Will Stephens is the owner/operator of 4Most Sound & Light based in the Philadelphia, PA area. He serves Delaware Valley brides with superb service and a memorable experience. If you are in the Delaware Valley, Lehigh Valley, or Reading, PA area and you are looking for a Philadelphia wedding DJ, you are welcome to visit his site at www.4MostSound.com.

Copyright Will Stephens, 2009

Father-Daughter/Mother-Son Dance — Make Them Special!

I have to thank Amy (of Amy & Matt, 5/22/2009), one of my brides-to-be, for this post. She was the latest of my clients to ask for song suggestions about the special dances at her wedding. I get this question every now and then and each time I spend way too much time researching and typing out responses. It’s time I canonize my thoughts in my blog. The truth is, many of the special dances I see lack emotion and “specialness.” They are mechanical and awkward. Personally, I might rather see a couple forgo the special dances than to perform a mechanical, perfunctory obligatory Father-Daughter or Mother-Son dance, but that’s just me. Though most of this article refers to the Father-Daughter dance, a similar thought process should go into the Mother-Son dance. Here are some tips to make those special dances more special.

First, if you want a list of song suggestions, do an online search for “father-daughter dance,” or similar wording. You will find list after list of suggestions. This will give you a good idea of what’s been done before. But that might be another problem–the fact that they have all been done before–too many times. Some of these songs are as overdone as the Chicken Dance. To some, this is a biggie. If it’s not a biggie to you, that’s great! You are not burdened by having to do something unique! Either way, these lists are a good place to start.

Second, many of these songs have been tagged as overly sappy, idealistic, or even creepy. Face it, many of the songs were written in a different era that may reflect a father-daughter relationship born of old-fashioned notions that are blatantly out-dated. Or they are lyrics that, for whatever reason, don’t reflect the relationship, or the moment. Consider the lyrics of “Daddy’s Little Girl.” Maybe its just me, but the lyrics seem to suggest more of a bedtime lullaby than a celebratory, meaningful dance. Here are the lyrics:

You’re the end of the rainbow, my pot of gold,
You’re daddy’s little girl to have and hold.
A precious gem is what you are,
You’re mommy’s bright and shining star.

You’re the spirit of Christmas, my star on the tree,
You’re the Easter bunny to mommy and me.
You’re sugar you’re spice, you’re everything nice,
And you’re daddy’s little girl.

You’re the end of the rainbow, my pot of gold,
You’re daddy’s little girl to have and hold.
A precious gem is what you are,
You’re mommy’s bright and shining star.

You’re the treasure I cherish so sparkling and bright,
You were touched by the holy and beautiful light.
Like angels that sing a heavenly thing,
And you’re daddy’s little girl.

I suggest you don’t just close your eyes and point to a song on the Father-Daughter/Mother-Son song list, especially if you want a meaningful moment. Instead, put a lot of thought into it. Consider, first of all, what your relationship means. Maybe your pop was one of those dads who was always there for you and that’s what you think of first when you think of him. Or perhaps he has always made you laugh and you think that might be a nice aspect of your relationship to honor. Maybe it’s not so much the relationship you want to honor, but maybe its a moment you want to relive instead, like that song that became special to you two at your Jr. High Father-Daughter Dance. Is there a song from a movie soundtrack that you and your dad watched together that became meaningful to you? Or maybe the perfect Father-Daughter Dance song for you two is “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” because you spent so many wonderful Saturday afternoons watching the Phillies with your dad. (Not sure how you would dance to that one though!) Perhaps there is a special song you and your dad grew up to; maybe one he used to sing to you, or one you both sang together on the way to the camp site every summer. Maybe you just want to tell him “thank you” in a song.

Or consider your dad’s point of view. He might have a song that’s special to him. Ask him. He might want a song that reflects you growing up and him giving you away. Also, consider that a Father-Daughter dance could symbolize your dad letting go and relinquishing his duties as protector to a new man, your husband. That’s a heavy concept, and one not easily appropriated for some dads, I’m sure.

Nor does the song have to be deeply meaningful. Make it fun instead! If your dad has always made you laugh growing up, then have one more laugh together! Turn the dance into a fun time, rather than a serious moment. Your guests will love it! If your dad was always one of those “cool” dads, then you might want to do a crazy dance routine like this one. Not all dads can pull that off, but a cool dad might want to at least attempt it! It’s one more chance to create a memory together! And that’s another thing… You don’t have to dance to remember the past; create a new memory right then and there that you will both laugh about for years to come.

That brings me to another point. Why not spend time with your dad in the weeks leading up to the Father-Daughter Dance with dance lessons? That’s one more special time to share with him. Trust me, from here on out, the majority of your special moments will be spent with a man other than your dad. Invite a photographer to take pictures of your dance lessons and then project them onto a screen at your wedding during the dance! How meaningful would that be!

So who is going to pick the song? You or him? Or will you decide together? Do you trust your dad to “surprise” you with his selection? Or do you agree full disclosure is the best way to go? If there is a surprise waiting to be sprung, make sure it is something you can both dance to.

One of the most meaningful and heart-touching dances I have witnessed happened at Andrew and Luana’s wedding last summer. Luana is Brazilian and the two of them took special dance lessons for their First Dance which was a fast-paced Brazilian dance. Not the usual First Dance, to say the least! It had everyone’s attention! But as unique and intriguing as that dance was, it is not what I remember most from their special dances. What I remember most was the special moment that took place on the dance floor between Andrew and his mother. At one point during the Mother-Son dance, Andrew started tearing up. His mother pulled a tissue from someplace and daubed his eyes during the dance. For a second, Andrew forgot where he was and started to lay his head on his mother’s breast, something I’m sure she pined for, and something which I’m sure, for that split second, conjured up all the times he had done so when he was growing up. For sure, it would have been one of the last times ever for such a cherished moment. It happened in a brief moment of time, but everyone saw it. It touched us all. It was a mother-taking-care-of-her-baby moment and when it happened, it captured everyone’s heart and we all let out a sigh. It was precious! The choreographed Brazilian dance which I’m sure Andrew and Luana spent hours practicing, was eclipsed by this one tender, unscripted moment.

I am working on a list of not-the-usual Father-Daughter/Mother-Son songs. Keep checking back for my progress on that list.

Will Stephens is the owner/operator of 4Most Sound & Light based in the Philadelphia, PA area. He serves Delaware Valley brides with superb service and a memorable experience. If you are looking for a Philadelphia wedding DJ, you are welcome to visit his site at www.4MostSound.com.

Copyright Will Stephens, 2009

“Ladies And Gentlemen, The Beatles!” February 9, 1964

Punxsutawney Phil just gave us 6 more weeks of winter, and with scant hope for a quick economic recovery here in 2009, well, we all might just burrow deeper under the covers until the weather changes. But it was not so for the US in the 2nd week of February 45 years ago today. It was this date, February 9, 1964 that The Beatles made their first TV appearance in the States on the Ed Sullivan Show to a record, 73.3 million viewers. For at least the next few weeks, viewers had much to look forward to at 8pm on Sunday nights as The Beatles were scheduled to appear for 3 consecutive weeks that February.

Their appearance on the Sullivan Show is seen as the start of the “British Invasion” and has been described as “the most important event in the history of rock music,” and as “a milestone in American pop culture” (see sources below). At the time, The Beatles held the #1 spot on the US Pop Charts with, “I Want To Hold Your Hand” and Beatlemania, which was rampant in England and Europe, was about to bust loose all over America. The Beatles played 2 sets that night to 15,000 in-studio girls in tears, jumpers, and horn-rimmed glasses, and it seemed as if all America stopped to watch these “youngsters from Liverpool” as Mr. Sullivan called them.

During the first appearance, The Beatles sang “All My Loving,” “Till There Was You” and “She Loves You.” Then, late in the hour, they returned to perform “I Saw Her Standing There” and “I Want to Hold Your Hand.” On the show, Ringo, keeping time for the boys, is shown carefree as ever, set up behind the others with his rickety drum kit. Paul can be seen doing his signature McCartney head-bob. The tight harmonies for which The Beatles are well know can be heard, especially in the opening song, “All My Loving” and “I Want To Hold Your Hand.”

Perhaps the country needed a lift, suggests Todd Leopold, a CNN.com reporter (see CNN source below). “Maybe it was just time. The country was in a funk. President Kennedy was dead, shot 77 days earlier.”

Maybe the country needs another lift. Or maybe we’ll all just burrow deeper. I was only 4 years old, and though I probably saw the show on TV that night, pajama-clad and cuddled up in an over-stuffed chair w/ my mom or my dad, I sure don’t remember it. But reading about it 45 years later and watching the video clips of The Beatles on YouTube, it makes me wish I could have been old enough to appreciate what was about to happen, starting that February night in 1964, and it makes me wonder what’s around the corner which might lift us out of our present day funk.

You can see the performance here: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7756999545272736794

http://www.iamthebeatles.com/article1036.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Sullivan_Show
http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Music/02/05/beatles.40/index.html

If you are in the Philadelphia, Reading, or Lehigh Valley area of Pennsylvania, and you are looking for a wedding DJ, you are welcome to stop by www.4MostSound.com.  DJ Will serves Delaware Valley brides with superb customer service and a memorable experience.  Call him at 215-498-0353 or click here to fill out an online form for more information.

4Most Sound Receives Bride’s Choice Award!

WeddingWire, the nation’s leading wedding technology company, just announced that 4Most Sound has won the 2009 Bride’s Choice Awards™!

In its inaugural year, the Bride’s Choice Awards recognizes and honors vendors from the WeddingWire Network that demonstrate excellent quality of service, responsiveness, professionalism, value of cost and flexibility. This year’s recipients represent the top three percent of WeddingWire’s vendor community, which includes over 100,000 wedding vendors from across the US. That means 4Most Sound is one of the very best wedding DJ entertainment services in the Philadelphia area.

Unlike other awards in which winners are selected by the company, the Bride’s Choice Awards are determined exclusively by recent newlyweds through surveys and reviews.

“We are excited to launch this annual award program to honor high-performing vendors based solely on the experiences of our WeddingWire community,” according to Timothy Chi, WeddingWire’s Chief Executive Officer. “This year’s recipients have set the bar high, exhibiting excellent service and expertise in the wedding industry.” 

4Most Sound would like to thank our past clients for speaking on our behalf and helping us win the 2009 Bride’s Choice Award!

If you are a bride in the Philadelphia area, or greater Delaware Valley area, we welcome you to take a closer look at our service.  You can find us at www.4MostSound.com. 

Be Frugal, Not Cheap – Further Thoughts On iPod Weddings

As a DJ, I have to wonder when the iPod wedding trend will end.  No, I am not concerned with loss of income because wedding tipsters are leading brides away from DJs.  On the contrary, I will be booked as much as I want to be this year because good DJs are always in demand.  But I am concerned for the brides who are led down the wrong path for the sake of saving money.  I was prompted to write this article because of a local news station who recently aired a segment on cutting wedding costs.  As it began, I knew one of the points would be to use an iPod in lieu of a DJ or band for the reception entertainment.  But I’m here to tell you, not as a wedding tipster, but as a wedding professional, there is more to eliminating the DJ than meets the eye.  Being frugal is one thing.  But eliminating the party by hiring an iPod is not being frugal; it is being mistaken.

Let me preface my thoughts with this:  I can’t assume every bride wants a fun, party atmosphere where all her guests are dancing.  If you don’t care about dancing, this article probably doesn’t pertain to you.  It’s been said the photographer captures the memories of a wedding, but the DJ creates them!  If you want a fun party atmosphere, if a great dance party is important to you, please consider these points.

First, all these tipsters talk about being frugal, but they don’t talk so much about being frugal with style. There is a big difference.  I hope we can all agree that a scaled back wedding can still be stylish.  But cutting expenses, just for the sake of cutting expense may not serve most brides well.  Instead, they should consider being frugal with style.  When everything else is beautiful, stylish, and carries the bride’s unique mark, and on top of that, can be done at a fraction of the cost, well, what else can one say except, “Brilliant!”  But then if she dispenses with the DJ and instead plugs in an iPod, that’s where her very lovely and brilliant reception is most likely to go down hill, especially if she wants to create a dance party experience.

Second, if you want to save money at your wedding, there are numerous ways of doing it that won’t affect the outcome of the reception.  Cupcakes might not be as photographic as a multi-tiered wedding cake,  but it will still serve your guests well.  But when you eliminate a good DJ from your list of wedding vendors, you are doing way more than just cutting costs.  You are eliminating a lot of fun, squelching a lot of memories, taking a chance that the reception agenda will flow smoothly on its own, and giving your guests a reason to leave early.  This is not being frugal.  This is jeopardizing your once-in-a-lifetime wedding on which you have spent thousands of dollars.  You may have heard it before and it’s true:  A good DJ is an insurance policy towards all your other wedding services.  What good is spending thousands of dollars on a fabulous wedding when the guests will leave soon after dinner because they are bored?  One thing to remember, your guests don’t want to watch you celeberate; they want to celebrate with you!

Third, plugging in an iPod will not be seen as being frugal as much as it will be seen as being cheap.  Your guests will wonder if you just don’t have the money, or if you just didn’t realize the iPod myth has long been busted.  I don’t mean to be disrespectful.  It’s just a fact.  There is a difference between being frugal and being cheap.

That there really is more to it than just cutting costs is born out by the number of DJs who write in to comment on iPod weddings when the topic is posted in an online forum.  I have read numerous forums where, once the idea has been proposed, DJs come out of the woodwork to counter the myth of iPod weddings.  Now then, when it is suggested that a bride save money by serving cupcakes instead of a wedding cake, why do the cake makers not come out of the woodwork to offer an opposing view?  Or why not the dressmaker when it is offered to go with a less expensive dress?  …Or why not the florist?  …Or why not the caterer?  …Or why not the venue managers?  I think the reason is because none of those things will affect the outcome of the wedding the way having an iPod wedding will.  Other wedding vendors, and other non-DJ’s may not know there is more to creating an experience than showing up and pushing PLAY.  But DJs know it.  And it’s not that we are afraid of losing opportunities.  It’s that we know the brides are being dis-served by being told they are being smart, saavy, and frugal when they kick the DJ to the curb and plug in their iPod.

One thing you have to realize is there is a big difference between great music, and great danceable music!  This is something I learned at my first DJ gig.  I was playing all the great hits across several eras and several genres and wondered why no one was dancing.  It was because, even though these might have been number one hits, they were not necessarily danceable.  A good DJ doesn’t just string songs together; he becomes a music programmer and creates an experience for the bride and groom and their guests.  An iPod can’t do that.  Further, the one given the duties of programming the iPod can’t do that either without the accumulated knowledge one gets by playing for a live dance floor every weekend.

I am not saying there is no time when an iPod isn’t a better choice.  In fact, I will counsel brides to use an iPod in 3 instances.

• First, when the guest list is very, very small and doesn’t warrant a lot of expense ANYWHERE.
• Second, when she doesn’t care about dancing, but is satisfied just with background music, and expects her guests to enjoy their dinner and then go home soon afterward.
• Third, when the couple is not just trying to be frugal, but when they have NO money and absolutely can’t afford to hire a DJ.  In that case, they have to realize their reception time will be reduced and won’t offer as many memories and stories as if they were in a better position and could have hired a DJ to create a dance atmosphere.

That’s how my wedding was.  We were po’ folks and in lieu of a catered dinner and fancy cake, we had our guests bake cookies to share.  It was more of a cookie exchange than a reception dinner.  Our music was provided by my brother-in-law who had just recently gotten out of the Navy and had money to buy a great stereo system which he was happy to lend.  I can’t remember any of the music that was played!  There was no dancing, just background music.  It was ok for us because we had NO money.  To have hired a DJ for our cookie-exchange wedding would have been as out-of-place as an iPod at…well, that’s my point, isn’t it?!

So there are times when a couple might opt for an iPod.  But it shouldn’t be just to save money.  Be frugal some place else and do it with style and you will be praised for your brilliance!  But in most cases, if you try to create a party without a seasoned DJ, you might also want to prepare for a short-lived, less-than-memorable reception.

—–

If you are in the Philadelphia, Reading, or Lehigh Valley area of Pennsylvania, and you are looking for a wedding DJ, you are welcome to stop by www.4MostSound.com.  DJ Will serves Delaware Valley brides with superb customer service and a memorable experience.  Call him at 215-498-0353 or click here to fill out an online form for more information.

Gotta Keep Them Dancing!

A prospective client recently asked me what is my plan to keep people on the dance floor? It was one of her interview questions and I guess I answered it to her satisfaction since she and her fiance eventually hired me for their wedding. The obvious answer is to keep playing music the guests want to hear and can dance to. But how is that done? How can the DJ know what the guests will dance to? Or what is involved in “reading the dance floor?” As a DJ, my job, in a nut shell, is to play the totally right song for this precise moment. It is both an art and a science and it is something that is not learned overnight.

There really is more to it than just showing up and pushing the PLAY button or just stringing together a bunch of cool songs. There is actual work going on behind the DJ console and a whole lot of group psychology. Experienced DJs know the dance floor is a living, evolving thing and that it changes every minute.  Often times, I will have a song cued up and ready to go because it was the perfect song a minute ago, but now that there are 20 seconds left before the current song ends, I realize it is not the perfect song now and I have 20 seconds to find it!

Reading the dance floor is essential.  It starts even before the dance floor is open.  As dinner is ending, for instance, I will often ramp up the music a bit by playing something that has a stronger beat than, say, Tony Bennett.  I watch as the feet start tapping, and as people start glancing at the dance floor.  This is one way I get them ready for the open dancing.  I consider the age of the guests, their gender, try to judge their demographic, try to guess what they like, and then play appropriate music. Once the dance floor is open, I will sometimes observe that the guests are dancing, but they are dancing only half-heartedly.  I know when I see this, that they want to dance, but not necessarily to this song.  I have to figure out what’s wrong with this song and find something they want to dance to.  Sometimes a given song will work and sometimes it doesn’t. When I play something that works, my next trick is to play another song that works.

But choosing the next song is not as easy as it looks. Music programming is about developing a sense of how people react to music. It’s learning the music and learning the people. I have to consider the tempo, and the timing (that is, is it time to change gears or keep doing what I’m doing?). I have to remember what a certain song has done in the past, that is, when was it right to play this and when was it right to keep it put away? Is the dance floor ready for this song and for where this song will lead?  Some songs work better later in the evening, and some songs work better when played next to other songs.  All this insight comes with time, comes by playing out in public, comes by trying this and failing and by trying that and being pleasantly surprised.  It’s a lot of trial-and-error at first but it leads to greater success.

While reading and responding to the dance floor’s reactions is necessary, it’s also playing defensively. A good DJ needs to lead the dance floor as well.  For instance, I know where I want to take the crowd.  I have several moves planned ahead.  I have several ideas of how to follow up the current song.  I know what time of night to play certain songs to get the best effect and it’s just a matter of leading them there.  I pace the night instead of wearing out the dance floor by going hell-bent for glory all night long.  It’s a matter of building drama — holding them back, then letting them go!  I watch the clock and use that to my advantage.  I know what I want to do with the next 60, 30, 15 minutes, and I lead the dance floor toward that goal.  It is a bit of crowd psychology and manipulation of the guests.  When I do it successfully, it’s a good feeling and it’s a good party!

There are times, however, when the DJ (any DJ) will drop a song which clears the dance floor. It happens several times throughout any party. But the sign of a good DJ is when he can fill it back up again with the next song or two.   Sometimes the dance floor empties because it’s a bum song, or it just didn’t follow the flow, or maybe because the DJ is wearing out the dance floor with too many good, fast songs in a row.  Again, reading the dance floor, and figuring out why it emptied out is important.

So then, figuring out the perfect next song is not an easy task.  It takes a lot of work to sense what will work best next.  Sometimes we get it right and sometimes we don’t.  A newbie DJ can play the perfect play list in his bedroom while he’s practicing his skills.  But it’s different when he gets out in public.  There is one element there that he doesn’t have in his bedroom–live bodies who want to dance!  The trick is to keep them on the dance floor!

Will Stephens is the owner/operator of 4Most Sound & Light based in the Philadelphia, PA area.  He serves Delaware Valley brides with superb service and a memorable experience.  If you are looking for a Philadlephia wedding DJ, you are welcome to visit his site at www.4MostSound.com.

Friday Night Weddings

Perhaps one of the biggest reason to have a Friday night wedding is the cost savings.  The cost for all or most of your vendors can be up to half of what it would be for a Saturday wedding.  After reading a lot of posts on wedding forums, it seems the biggest problem with Friday night weddings is consideration for guests.  Most of your guests will get off work at, say, 5pm, will race home to change, and then will race to your ceremony site. They will be stressed because of the work day, because of the traffic, because they had to rush, and because they will be hungry since they didn’t have time to eat.  Some of them might be compelled to take off work.  While there are other trade offs to consider regarding Friday night weddings, these two things –the cost benefit vs. guest considerations–seems to be the biggest advantage and disadvantage.  But it doesn’t have to be all bad for your guests!  Try swapping the cocktail hour and the ceremony for a unique and guest-friendly wedding!

The usual order of events is the ceremony, followed by the cocktail hour (during which the bride and groom get their pictures done) and finally the dinner and dance party. But with this arrangement, realize by the time your guests get to eat dinner, they will either be famished, or will be stuffed from eating too many cocktail hour appetizers, or drunk out of their heads for drinking on an empty stomach!

But a more casual start to your wedding day–say, one that starts with a cocktail hour–will allow them to take their time getting ready for and arriving to your wedding.  They can be a little late if they want, after all, the actual ceremony won’t start for another 30 to 60 minutes.  In the mean time, they can have a drink, have a few  hors d’oeuvres , unwind a bit, and be in place for your ceremony when it finally starts.  After your ceremony and the customary well-wishes, the guests can make their way to their tables while you prepare for your grand entrance.  Your special dances, the toasts, the dinner, and then it’s time for the dance party!  Whew!  You got it all in and your guests were delighted to have been invited to celebrate with you!

Your guests might be glad for the change up, but some brides might see a couple problems with this plan.  First, it’s traditional for the groom NOT to see the bride until it is time for him to marry her.  But with all the weddings I’ve done, this tradition seems to be waning.  I often see the bride and groom taking pictures before their ceremony, greeting guests together, and even involving themselves in last minute details together.

A second problem with the plan is a more practical consideration.  The bride may think if she has an hour-long photo shoot before the ceremony, she might look or feel less put-together for the ceremony.  She will want to have her hair and makeup and dress perfect for her first public appearance.  But the couple can build in enough time for her to touch up her appearance before her walk down the aisle.

One of the biggest considerations with a Friday night wedding is the scheduling.  You can’t start too soon or many of your guests will have to take off work or show up late; you can’t start too late or you won’t have enough time to celebrate.  This idea might circumvent the scheduling concerns and will add a bit of uniqueness to your affair.  Not only that, but from reading the wedding forums, it seems a lot of brides favor a night-time ceremony because it seems warmer and more romantic.

But one thing will make this plan the most doable, and that is your ceremony has to be in the same venue as the other components.  It probably won’t work if your guests show up at your cocktail hour, then have to leave to go across town to the ceremony venue, and then drive back to the cocktail/reception venue.  Have all three components at the same venue and you should be fine.

Whenever I have a consultation with a couple who’s date is on a Friday, I always run down the special considerations involved with a Friday wedding.  Most of the time they are already clued in on the caveats but sometimes they are not.  I work with them as best I can within my domain to mitigate any potential problems.

If you are a bride in the Philadelphia, PA area who is looking for a wedding entertainment I welcome you to consider 4Most Sound & Light.  Check out our website at www.4MostSound.com.  And to all of you, best wishes for your wedding day, no matter when it occurs!

The “New” Wedding Music

Wedding Music by 4MostSound.com

“So…  Tell me about the music you want at your wedding.”  This is a question all my clients have heard from me.  These days couples are doing their own thing at their weddings.  Classical pieces by  Vivaldi, Handel, Pachelbel, Mozart, Bach, Beethoven and even Wagner are no longer the default standards heard at wedding ceremonies.

My clients instruct me to play Alternative, modern love songs, Disney love songs, New Age, and current Country love songs for their ceremony music about as much as they instuct me to play Classical pieces.  Probably the strangest type of music I’ve played this year is  computer game music.  When the bride and groom first requested this music during our consultation, I didn’t know what to think.  I had in mind the beeps, clicks, whirs, and explosions of games like Pong and Space Invaders.  Or maybe something a little more melodious like Pac-Man.  But they assured me the music would be great, and since then, I’ve learned music composition for the new computer games is big time.  I played it, and it was beautiful!  (Thank you, Eva & Nathan!)

Cocktail and dinner hours still see a lot of the standard crooners like Frank Sinatra (especially here in the Philadelphia area), Tony Bennett, and Dean Martin.  But the newer lounge singers seem to be more prevalent like Michael Buble, Harry Connick Jr., Diana Krall, etc.  But I have also played Reggae, R&B, Alternative, Pop, and deep Trance (for a Halloween wedding).  Really, when it comes to wedding music, the sky’s the limit these days.

When it comes to the dance party, however, I see very little difference in the music from one wedding to another.  Most want the standard dance and party hits that are guaranteed to get the guests dancing.  But others want to pick their own genres and when they do that, it’s usually something undanceable.  But these weddings are rare.  Most of my clients understand the dance portion of the event is meant for dancing and they are happy to oblige their guest with good danceable music.  Last year, however, I had a client who wanted stoner music like Grateful Dead and other non-danceable artists (Bob Dylan, Leonard Cohen, etc).  This summer I have a wedding that will feature punk and hard rock.  We’ll see if anyone dances!

When the DJ is asked to play something that is rather undacneable, he is put between 2 opposing forces: the client and the dance floor.  Then we are faced with dilemna of pleasing the client, or pleasing the dance floor.  If we please the dance floor, the client is often upset because we did not play their requested music, and after all, they are paying for our services.  But if the music is undanceable the guests are unhappy and won’t dance and find an excuse to get out of there early, and on their drive home, they are discussing how the DJ sucked.

I have my own way of handling a situation like that, but that’s another story for another time.

Long story short, if you want something unique for your ceremony or cocktail/dinner music, you are not alone.  I say, go for it!  Deviating from the normal ceremony and cocktail/dinner music will infuse your wedding with a bit of your own personality.  When it comes to the dance portion of your reception, however, you would do well to consider your guests.  Your guests don’t want to watch you celebrate.  They want to celebrate with you!  Make it easy for them!

If you want more information about our wedding DJ service, you are welcome to tune into our site at www.4MostSound.com.  We serve Philadlephia area brides with superb service and a memorable experience.

Until next time, Cheers!

Eenie-Meenie-Miney-Mo… Or, How To Choose A DJ

Last night I recieved an inquiry via email from a bride-to-be. She told me a little about her wedding and asked about my services. She also asked if I could send her a promotional video which would showcase my skills. I am asked that every now and then. It seems like a sensible question to ask. But a demo video might not be the best way to assess a DJ and it is surely not the only way.

Often times, a promotional video will only show the best 5 minutes of a 4-hour performance. Think about it. A demo video is like a business letter. You want it to show you in the best light, right? So the smart business person will edit and spellcheck the business letter until it is clear and concise and typo-free. A demo video will also be edited. It will have all the bad minutes edited out and will show the best few minutes of the night. Or it might contain the best footage from several different events.

I don’t mean to suggest this is the case with all or even most DJs or any other performer. It is just something the first-time purchaser of DJ services should realize. So how else can you assess your DJ’s skills?

Instead of, or in addition to the demo video, you might request to see a live performance. If the DJ has a regular gig at a club or bar, that might be easy enough to do. But remember, too, that kind of performance is much different than what he might do at a wedding. On the other hand, if he mostly does private affairs, you may not have a chance to see him live. In that case, ask for references. But overall, the best way to assess a DJ is to interview him.

Even if a friend tells you he played at her wedding, he may still not be the best DJ for you. Her style and yours might be totally different. Interview the DJ and make sure he fits YOUR style and is someone you want playing at YOUR wedding.

So how do you interview a DJ? In the days and weeks to come, I will be posting more about interviewing your DJ. If you can’t wait until then, you can read all about it in an article from my website at www.4MostSound.com. You can find the article here entitled, “How To Interview Your Potential DJ.”